Unfiltered anecdotes from the ESL classroom

by Natalie

So this weekend. Just for an insight into how delightful teaching English at a training centre can be. A kid bought a blade into class and waved it in the face of his classmates because he didn’t write the word ‘breakfast’ as quickly as someone else wrote the word ‘breakfast’ therefore he didn’t win a point for his team and he was mad about it. Really mad. Like a not normal amount of mad.

Since my teaching assistant has clearly never come close enough to common sense to catch any, she tried to hug him because of course it’s not a problem to threaten violence with knives and I am a terrible person for stopping him from going about his blade-wielding in peace. He started to punch her repeatedly. Which was also totally ok for her. And then she wiped his tears away for him because he was too tired from attacking her to do it himself and he needed comforting after being reprimanded for threatening other children with a stabbing.

And then I asked my teaching assistant (who speaks little English) why he even had a knife in school, and she responded calmly with ‘yes, it’s a knife. You know, to kill with’. Oh right. Brilliant.

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